Lately I have felt the overwhelming need to research grids and something about the number 5.  I have also felt very strongly that I am here for a reason and it is important that I find out why.  I haven't quite figured it out, but I did end up having a rather interesting meditation.  One thing that made this meditation so different was it seemed so closely directed at my life and not in general terms.  It also came through so clearly and strongly, as if they were literally right next to me having a conversation in my mind. 

is like a guy in white holding out his hand
he is floating upward...blue eyes I think
water and waves
crystal city?
I feel pulled to right as if there is emptiness to my left.
there is also warmth to right
fire
light
is night sky now
looks like something from a native american setting.
is like a fire, but open sky...kinda sparse land tho
like southwest with lizards and gekos, etc.
dry
someone--isn't clear what person looks like--takes hands and puts behind my head...up from bottom and pust them on back and pulls me forward to rest forehead against his
green
his eys are closed
golden peace
is like he cries
no more pain
release
freedom
I reach out to touch tree with gloved hand...dunno why its gloved
can't feel its heart
they are asleep
how do I wake them up?
rest
time
need tiem
help rest
have seed within
go ddep
is like the sun is cold
star is cold
is on left
leave
come here
atlantan
never knew
sea waves and whwite robes blowing in wind
gold crest in hair
on edge of sea
coastal city
touch stars
like I reach up to stars and literally feal at home
stars are there
like all stars r there
golden light
blue
is this atlantis?
yes
see city
as once was
is like am watwching city
am there and yet not
know what will happen
dreams ar e strong
fall into water
earht beneath feete
book of ages/life
angles of freedom? wings and feathers
show way
book has indigo eyes bright violet eyes
looking at me
knows me
see souls
bright ilght
from soul whines thru you
look to it for guidance and love
is only path u will find for u
please know life is liove
understand me as I am you
iner seflf reminds u to understand life purpose
grids are near compelteion and ready
what do I do with grids?
love light show thruogh them
how?
heart
Iheart?
look, see understand
live life and see
rain falls through but light remains
shine brightly
beacon of light
to steer others away and claer direction
find peace in self and freedome
love self and let go of life
return to who you once were and see
I know you
book is fading
lve light swhispers.
am I finished?
yes. for now
ranbow lines come to u
deep sleep patersn change
light wake up
sleep no more awake
touch sky stars/spirits/wind(is a creature)
then know way
angels fly u there
peace
chansu
bight light
open eyes waking dream
we go no where
witwh u
and see
u noever really alone
sleep awake
tired osul
rest
full of flie and love and energy
free now
rainbowe light
come to ue
ues it
free it from heart
let it out on others
am stading watching waves agin in whtie dress thing
sleeveless
natural state
white robe for reason
priestess
cut throat/wrist
knew waves
saw lifef
burned on palce
and alive
old wars familar song
see now, so weary
live free and release
old self
no more
hold onto nothing for tnohign is real
all is afke illusion
except love
love is real
let come messages of youth an dlife
bring knowledg eo fold to world and release
live in freedome
love
i see a baby with blue eyes and smailing face....think he blond
children know you
(think in refernce to children I see at restuarant)
see you
real you
cat's cradle
see life thru child eyes
remain child
stay in self
never lose sight of here
pain goes but fear reamins
release
see now damp dew of morning
and free self from thot and mind
love and live
rejoice in world
and lieve happily in it.
loving joy
trees atlk funny
love surrounds me
sleep well
rest
young dear one
we be with you
peace to you
is almost irish soundingred hair
sleep
watch over you
safe here
tell brother he is loved
and needed in this world
he doesn't know it
yet needs your love
support
let him her it from ur lips
love you sensitive
is good thing
was like a flash of light and was slightly darker and now I'm more awake and rooted in this world. Can still feel them around, but not like I was.
Is like I feel two to my right, maybe one behind
not orbs, people
one stands out more
he is taller but none are clear to me
(wil be they say)
is odd
(rest now--send and rest)
(goodnight0